Decisions and Choices

By Amy Price PhD

One simple way we can sort out what choice is best is to create a plus and minus column. Put in the advantages and disadvantages of your proposed choice. Number each choice on an “important to me” scale of one to ten. Add up both columns or get a friend to help.

Still undecided? Separate your thoughts into three sections I feel this way, I think this about this and I sense or remember this could happen. The first method gives you the “what” of the story while the second method gives you the “why.”

Now you need the “when.” This you can get by asking your self “Why is this a good time for this choice?” What can I gain by waiting, deciding immediately or not choosing at all”? For the where of this story consider if this is the best place or would a change of location make a difference. Also ask your self is there any knowledge missing I need to make this choice.

Sleep on your decisions and listen to the voice on the inside. Many genius minds got their inspiration after napping or a good night’s sleep. Often you will sense a green light, a red light or a yellow proceed with caution.

Our minds have amassed countless categories and can assess in a moment of time what you could take months to think about actively. Many genius minds got their inspiration after napping or a good night’s sleep. It can work for you too!

Mathematicians have determined we can make informed choices by following what are called axioms. They use numbers to explain things but we will use life examples to share these ideas.

There are 5 principles or axioms for making decisions.

1.Comparability

2.Transitivity

3.Dominance

4.Independence

5.Invariance

The first principle is called “comparability.” For this you need to know you prefer apples to bananas or banana to apples or that you dislike or like both bananas and apples.

Axiom two is called “transitivity,” which means if you prefer apples to bananas and bananas to carrots you must prefer apples to carrots.

“Dominance” is axiom three. Here is how it works, a choice is dominant and must be preferred if when it is compared to an alternate choice it is best in at least one respect and better in all other respects. Dominated or lesser choices are not to be preferred.

Axiom four is called “independence.” This says “no outside data should affect your choice.”

The last axiom, number five, is “invariance.” Different scenery involving the same choice scenario should not affect the choice. Another way of saying this is your choice preference should remain independent of how it is described.

When any of these axioms are not met there are several possibilities. The choice was not yours to make. In this case move on. You can not take responsibility for other peoples’ choices.

Zig Ziglar says ‘Life is like the movies …You produce your own show!”

Happy people live nineteen percent longer. Make a good investment. You can invest in worry or you can invest in you.

There was not enough information available to make an informed choice or you were not given the power to make the choice. Life happens and life cycles, what goes around comes around. Think out a strategy for next time or watch for something effective another individual is using to negotiate the issue.

You are a champion. Experience and coaching will help you win. Experts practice and watch for doors of opportunity. Novices give up because they see an event as defining them.

Failure is an event and not an identity.

Any novice can become an expert. Failure is an event and not an identity. Failure looks for servants, refuse to serve it!

Your choice was clouded by a cultural mindset or political manipulation and does not represent you.

For this scenario you will feel dissatisfied even when the choice is beneficial to you because you can not own it without changing your identity.

■Think about how you can change your world one step at a time.

■The way you see yourself is the way others will treat you.

■Change your words and determine your destiny.

■Your words will build you or destructure (destroy) you.

■Go back to the chapter that suggests you decide what you would do if only you could. Find a way to take one step towards your destiny and do it!

My Name is Rose

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.

I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.

She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?"

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant squeeze.

"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.

She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids..."

"No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake.

We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.

Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, " We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.

There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.

We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it!

There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.

If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.

Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets.

The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets."

She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."

She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives. At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.

One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.

When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they'll really enjoy it!

These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL. We make a Living by what we get. We make a Life by what we give.

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it

I had this sent to me in an email ...Author Unknown, If anyone knows the author I would be happy to credit this

Relationships: Making changes in how you relate

Relationships: Making changes in how you relate

By Amy Price PhD

Above is a blog link to an excellent way to see relationships and make changes. Often the best ideas are the simple ones which lay out the facts so we are free to make changes in life. The link above shows you how...try it! Sometimes no matter how much you care or grieve there is no power in your hand to make changes, ultimately the only person you have power to change is yourself. Changes in others can only be decided by them. In the end the only possible response after we have done all we know to do is silence and time. Love and kindness are not always reciprocal and justifying or proving our case when wronged can become a waste of time when those choosing not to believe in us or see our side just do not care or believe a lie.

Friends can say you are casting your pearls before swine, they are not worth it or some day they will pay. In those days be a friend to yourself, never pretend it doesn't matter but discipline the amount of time you think about it. Hint: If you are trying to fix it in your heart and mind 24 hours a day 23.5 hours could be a starting place. Remember all things pass, when I look back to people who hurt me 20 years ago I can no longer remember the feeling, how they smelled or what they said yet people who have done small kindnesses I have remembered for ever. So consider each day is one step closer to healing and be kind to yourself so you in turn can be kind to others...Remember happy people live 19% longer and each day you can choose joy or sadness...choose joy